...picking my own costume
...having my picture taken
...making magic
...giggling up a storm
...dancing like a fairy
...beautiful butterfly wings
...the glow of anticipation
...sharing the fun with my sister
...inspecting the haul
Archive | October, 2009
Tweet, tweet
25 OctI have purposely avoided signing up for Twitter. Michael had an account, did not like it, and cancelled his account. But I know I would be addicted in an instant because a lot of my favourite bloggers also tweet. It’s hard enough to keep up with my blog addictions subscriptions as it is. Besides, there are so many moments in my day when I think, “I should put this on my Facebook status”. Often there isn’t enough time to sit down to blog, but there is enough time to write out a sentence about something funny that happened, to announce a small victory, or just whine a little.
Here are some of the things you might have seen in my Twitter feed over the last couple of days, if I had such a thing (and yes, some of them were on FB):
- Finally got around to brushing Halia’s four little teeth tonight. Halia was SOOO pleased that she got to have her teeth brushed after watching me do Jade’s so many times. She even knows how to dip her toothbrush into the cup of water. How adorable is that??!
- I feel cheated. The book had an interesting title and an interesting cover. And was a good read. Now I found out it’s the first of a trilogy for which the third book has not yet been released. This is doomed to be yet another series I never finish.
- I am unsure whether I am happy or sad that I taught Jade how to say “monitor” instead of “mawtimer”.
- When do babies learn to be afraid of heights? Because Halia climbs EVERYTHING. After falling off and clonking her head she cries bloody murder. Then climbs the damn thing again.
- Jade had broccoli in her keto soup tonight AND SHE LOVED IT! She told me several times, “I like broccoli!” Hurray! A new ingredient!
Thrilling isn’t it? Admit it, you’d follow me, wouldn’t you? You can thank me now for not adding to your online addictions.
Talk to me vegetabley
23 OctI’ve lost a bunch of weight in the last couple of months. This is because I started a diet called “between-getting-the-baby-fed-and-the-keto-kid-fed-there’s-no-time-to-eat”. I am frequently having breakfast two hours after I get up or supper at 9 p.m.
BubblyBunny and I have made a pact to eat better and we’ve developed meal plans. Sort of. I’ve yet to actually start using mine, which is pretty awful considering it was all my idea.
Part of my problem is balance. I do eventually eat when I’m hungry, but I’m definitely not getting my 5-10 servings of fruits and veggies in a day. I find it so hard to squeeze them in now because while most meat I can throw in the oven, pot, or slow cooker with just a few extra ingredients, I find vegetables much more work, what with washing, peeling, coring, chopping…
I’m getting so tired of red peppers and zucchinis, something I never thought I’d say. I know I should buy more squashes because they really are dead easy to fix (as long as there isn’t also meat in the oven) and I can use them for Jade AND for Halia. But squash will only take me so far.
Tell me: what are your favourite veggies and how do you prepare them? Extra points for super-duper easy or fast!
Trooper
23 OctIt makes me want to cry.
Jade asked for sausages for breakfast this morning. “Okay,” I said, “we can do that.” Then Michael mentioned that Halia had had watermelon for breakfast. Jade said she wanted watermelon, too. I said, “okay, Jade. It will just be a small piece, but you can have some watermelon.”
I got her breakfast ready and put down three things in front of her. A ramekin with the sausages, another one filled with vegan margarine and coconut oil, and the lid from one of the ramekins with a tiny piece of watermelon, smaller than your average playing die.
Jade was sitting on Michael’s lap and the first thing she went for was the watermelon.
“Mmmmm!” she said in delight. And started in on her sausages.
All I could see was how tiny that piece of watermelon was. But Jade? Jade was happy that she got some watermelon.
A thankful pause
10 OctAlthough the dark emotions were really genuine, I’m feeling slightly sheepish for getting to such a low point last week. I know it was a culmination of single-parenting, stressful travel preparations, and lack of sleep, so I have been doing my best since then to slow down and get to bed earlier. I’ve even spent a few minutes on a couple of nights writing down things I am grateful for, and I’m hoping to make it a habit.
Things really are so much better than a year ago. It’s not that I don’t appreciate it; it’s just that sometimes I’m so focussed on the end goal (seizure-freedom, seizure-freedome, seizure-freedom…) that everything else is a blur. So this week, I’ve also been trying to regain perspective, to be thankful for the things that are great in my life.
Appropriately, this is Thanksgiving weekend which is a fact that somehow escaped my consciousness until a few days ago. (And, might I add, neener, neener, my American readers have to wait a while yet for their turkeys!)
I won’t bore you with an exhaustive list. Instead, a few thankful highlights in no particular order:
- Two beautiful, loving, and funny little girls I have the fortune to call my daughters. This week I have tried to be more present for both of them, instead of being focussed on mundane tasks that had to be done.
- A loving and supportive husband whose talents and accomplishments I am proud of, and who I am happy to finally have home!
- Daily support from Amanda, which enables us to function as a normal family.
- That the Jade of today compared to the Jade of one year ago is like comparing a ray of sunshine to a shadow.
I have heard that the secret to being happy in life is not getting what you want, but being happy with what you get. I still think it’s important to strive, to stretch, and to challenge ourselves, but, for this moment, I am happy to pause for a little bit and thank God — thank God! — for the wonderful things in my life.
Keto crisis
8 OctWe all left the house around 4:00 p.m. The two girls and I were heading downtown to run Halloween-related errands, and Amanda was leaving early for a bachelorette party she had helped organize.
I don’t often do errands with both kids in tow because, given a choice, I’d rather not buckle and unbuckle, load and unload, entertain and feed, while I’m trying to just get stuff done. But since Michael is out of town, I’m on my own for handling that whining witching hour before supper, and this was a good way to keep everyone occupied.
Jade had just woken from her nap (always a bit of a crank-fest then) and I had my hands full of baby and toys and keto snack and diaper bag and sundry, so I tossed out, “Lock the door please?” as Amanda came out of the house.
Since Amanda had premade both Jade and Halia’s food, I timed our return for about 5:45. That would give me fifteen minutes to strip off boots and coats, wash hands, warm up and finish mixing food, and then serve it to my hungry birds. I hauled everyone and everything up our front stairs… only to find that the large bunch of keys in my pocket did not include the house keys.
Leaving our purchases at the front door, I schlepped the kids four houses down to Heather’s place for an extra set of our keys. (The ones that had been over at Tom’s house across the street had already been collected a couple of months ago when I forgot my keys on the sailboat, and — oops! — they were now hanging on the key rack inside the locked house.) I got to Heather’s and she said, “No, we gave those back to you ages ago so that Ryan could get in.” Riiiiiight, back in June, when we were in Ottawa and he was coming by to finish up some work.
Crap. Crappity, crappity crap.
Suddenly, my boneheadedness wasn’t just a minor inconvenience, but a huge problem. How in the world could I get Jade fed? Heather offered the contents of her kitchen and pantry, but there is no way I can concoct a dairy and egg-free keto meal (without a scale!) at some random everyday kitchen. No coconut oil? No coconut milk? No egg-free mayonnaise or dairy-free margarine? Then enormity of not being able to get into my own house was like a punch in the gut.
I called Amanda’s cell and left a message. I waited a few minutes. I tried phoning again. Then I tried the spa I knew she’d gone to, but it was after their regular business hours, so no one answered their phone.
Thank goodness for living in a small town. Heather let me leave Jade there (playing happily her kids’ toys and books) while I scooped up Halia and drove downtown to the spa, hoping I hadn’t misunderstood, hoping Amanda wasn’t somewhere else altogether. I got a parking spot right in front of the spa, snatched Halia from her carseat, and raced up the stairs. The bachelorette party appeared to be in full swing, but I spotted Amanda right away. While I was driving downtown, she had gotten my message and was waiting to give me her set of keys. (“I hope the rest of your weekend is better!” she wished me as I swooped back out the door.)
Halia was in full hissy-fit mode by the time I collected Jade, but by 6:30, both girls had were eating their suppers, and they were even in bed pretty much on time.
And me? My neck and shoulders are incredibly stiff and I am thinking with much longing of that spa downtown. Don’t you love it when a story has a good ending? Because then you can look back on your own stupid self… and laugh. But this older and wiser me is going to have a whole new strategy for keys from here on in.
Monsters in the living room
7 OctToday we built a couch-cushion fort. I don’t know why we’ve never done this before, but I figured it was high time Jade was initiated into the ritual of furniture fort-building. She absolutely loved it. (And, in fact, pretty much pitched a fit when it was time to stop playing to have supper.)
Of course, when you remove the cushions from your couch, you inevitably remember that you never vacuum there. And you may be disgusted by what you see. So, if you’re feeling as if you really ought to at least try to do some household work now and then and it might as well be now seeing as the kids are busy and happy, then you just might haul out the vacuum cleaner.
And you might discover, tucked tightly into a crevice, and perilously close to being swallowed up by the structure of the couch, one of the missing cordless phones (dead as a doornail, of course). And you might wonder, why didn’t I look for it in the couch sooner?
Then, you might gingerly feel under the back and arms of the sofa, in those tricky spaces where eyeballs can’t reach and sharp things might linger, and squishy things might exist.
You might be surprised to find a piece of Lego that is so foreign and unidentifiable, that it is clearly a leftover from the previous owners of the couch. You might find the ear wax digger (I am not kidding you) of a former guest. (Apparently, persons of Chinese descent have harder ear wax and a specialized tool is required to get it out because Q-tips just don’t cut it. And that is your totally disgusting PSA of the day.) You might further find the beloved “Camping” model Swiss Army Knife your husband has been missing for months if not years. And you might wonder at the finding of it, since your own identical (but newer) knife, which was also lost for a similar amount of time, was found earlier in the day when you cleaned out an old purse you never use to give it to your daughter for “dress up” purposes.
Then you might just conclude that the real monsters in your (w)rec(k) room are not your children, but the fuzzy-from-cat-and-dog-hair and all-too-innocent-looking green couches.
And they’re hungrier than you think.
Thanks heaps, Dad! (And thanks to Aroma Borealis!)
6 OctWell, Mother Nature sure rained (or, rather, snowed) on my parade by cutting off the game before it really got a chance to get started. As you may have read in my updated post, I declared Dave and MFA Mama as winners when I closed the contest around 10:30 a.m.
Luckily for you, my Dad gleefully pointed out how complicated things really were by using my carefully-worded rules against me. In case you missed it:
Alright, kiddo, hold them horses. Before you declare winners, you may have to do some serious sleuthing yet. Let’s see – if there is one cm on your deck on October 5th I will readily concede defeat for myself, but if you are going to declare runners-up, it gets one whole lot more complicated.
First of all, Stacie bet on “today”. But Dave beat her to “today”, so by your rules, Stacie should be moved to October 6th, which will make HER runner up.
Then there is the question of Murray – your “update” was not time-stamped. This leaves the serious question as to whether or not Murray posted his comment before or after your closing notice. If it was before, then by your rules, Murray would have to move in line after Stacie, which would make him second runner-up. And by the same immutable logic, MFA Mama will be third runner up.
And since you already promised a win to MFA Mama, I hope you got lots of Kleenex in the closet, including the extra box you’ll need to dry off your tears of laughter.
Dang it, I hate it when he’s right. (Which, he would tell you, is always.) Murray did indeed post his comment before I closed the contest (which I totally meant to “time stamp”, argh). So instead of one winner, I now have four!
Mailing out four boxes of Kleenex would totally break my budget for this game. Happily, I was able to find a prize that I think the four winners will enjoy a lot more.
I called up the lovely folks at Aroma Borealis, which is a local company that creates herbal skin care products, aromatherapy products, and herbal teas, all inspired by the northern boreal forest. (I luuuuurve their hydrating facial cream and their all-natural shampoos and conditioners! And I love going into their store because it smells so good in there without being overwhelmingly perfumey. *happy sigh*)
Aroma Borealis has agreed to make up special bags of their own Arctic Wildflower Tea for our four winners, perfect for boiling up one pot on a cold autumn (or winter) evening. There’s even an extra bag for Dad, since all you winners can thank him for making sure I didn’t cheat you out of your prizes. (Do you think he missed a calling as a lawyer?)
Well, it was short-lived, but I declare this game a success on the basis of raising the humour quotient around here. Thanks to Dad and Aroma Borealis for stepping in when they were needed. This time again next year, okay?
Taking bets on the first snow
4 OctMichelle over at Scribbit is playing a game where readers can guess when the first snowfall of the season will happen in Anchorage. Fun!
Here in Whitehorse, we’ve also got snow on the mountain tops. Last Monday, I saw a few cars around town with snow on them, so somebody around here got some of the real stuff. We even had a few flakes in my neighbourhood this past week, but nothing that stayed on the ground.
But! That train is definitely coming.
So, in my ongoing quest for levity, I am happy to host the “When do you think we’ll get the first Whitehorse snowfall?” game. I can’t offer a baby moose calf as a prize, but there will be a prize. To be decided at my whim. (Because you’ll play along even if I give away a box of Kleenex, right? Right? C’mon, it’s cold and flu season.)
I usually don’t expect the first snowfall until Halloween, but last year we got real stay-on-the-ground-snow at least two weeks earlier than that, so it really could be any day now. (I just hope it isn’t tomorrow, or this contest won’t even get to see the light of day.)
Okay, so here’s how to play (with major head nods to Michelle, since I am totally copying and pasting her game here):
- Pick a date, any date, from October 5th on.
- Leave me a comment with your day, making sure I have a way to reach you should you win. (That means no fake e-mail addresses!)
- I will update this post with a list of the days taken with the names of participants as they come in. If you have a blog I’ll link to it.
- Only one person per date (because I don’t have anywhere near as many readers as Michelle!). If your date gets filled up I’ll just move you to the next available day following.
- When it does officially snow with a measurable amount of white stuff in my front yard (that’s my measuring stick) I’ll give a shout out to whoever picked the winning day.
Sound like fun? What better way to start looking forward to the first snowfall?
- October 5: Dave
- October 6:
- October 7:
- October 8:
- October 9: MFA Mama
- October 10:
- October 11: Beanie
- October 12:
- October 13:
- October 14:
- October 15: Kara
- October 16: Roger
- October 17: Nai-Nai
- October 18: Susan
- October 19: Tammy
- October 20: Tanya Leclerc
- October 21:
- October 22:
- October 23:
- October 24:
- October 25:
- October 26: Kathleen
- October 27:
- October 28:
- October 29:
- October 30:
- October 31:
UPDATE: THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED! Damn, I knew I should have posted this sooner! It appears that there is already about 1 cm of snow on my deck and front yard (which, sadly, means it’s a measurable amount). I’m not so sure that it’s not going to stick around for at least the afternoon, Dave. So I guess that means you win, although seeing as you were actually getting snowed on when you guessed, I won’t credit you with any psychic powers. Next closest was MFA Mama, so it only seems fair that you both win… um… something. I haven’t decided yet since last night, but I’ll let you know soon!
Wise friends
3 OctOh, you are wonderful! Thank you so much for all your messages of love and support, for your encouragement and your prayers, and for just being there. Your words are a soothing balm to my bruised soul.
I am amazed at your collective wisdom. A small sample:
- Reminders to take one day at a time, that I’m not alone in how I feel, that parenting is tough for the best of us.
- One friend told me that she finds inspiration in reading Psalms, knowing they were written by people “who have suffered but triumphed over their difficulties”.
- Another friend mentioned that she has also been telling herself to “love thy neighbour, love thy neighbour, love thy neighbour… through gritted teeth!”
- Someone gently pointed out that I am at high risk for depression, with high stress and lack of sleep contributing to a very real physical toll and potential biochemical imbalances. Which is a good reminder to be kinder to myself, isn’t it?
I also got some practical suggestions for things like a good local therapist, using a sunlamp, taking time out for myself. I have such wise and fabulous friends!
I’m not sure just what exactly I’m going to do, but something has to change. Besides the horrible low points, I know that the emotional roller coaster has affected my memory. This week I forgot to give Jade one night-time dose of Clonazepam, which theoretically might not be such a bad thing, but we’re already weaning her off her morning dose. It’s a highly-addictive drug, so screwing up right now is dangerous to Jade’s seizure control. (Withdrawal also makes Jade very emotional, which doesn’t help me in any way!) (And in case you didn’t know, Clonazepam is related to Valium. You’ll be glad to know I haven’t actually taken any myself yet!)
Anyway, for today I very much feel lifted up by your love and prayers, and I thank you. Tomorrow is Sunday, a day of rest. Like all mothers, I’ll have to continue with the everyday work of parenting, of course. But I will take the time to be grateful, to reflect on my blessings, to thank God for them, and for you.
