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I love you to pieces

23 Nov

Every night when I tuck Jade into bed, I tell her I love her.  I don’t always say, “I love you.”  Sometimes it’s, “I love you bigger than this house!”  Sometimes I tell her, “I love you a bushel and a peck.”

A couple of weeks ago, I tucked Jade into bed and said to her, “I love you to pieces!”  She objected.

“You can’t love me to pieces!” she said.

“No?”

“No,” she said, “but you can love me whole.”

Yep, I love that girl.

Tonight at bedtime she said to me, “I love you in pieces!”

I laughed and told her, “No, no, it’s: I love you to pieces.”

She giggled and said, “Okay!  I love you in two pieces.”

I tried to correct her again, but it only resulted in more hilarity.  She almost couldn’t settle down to sleep, she thought it was all so hilarious.

And so did I.

Waiting for the party

13 Nov

Halia turned three on Friday and we had a lovely day together as a family, with Michael returning home from a week away that afternoon.  She was old enough to ask for a party this year, so we hosted that today.  There was a balloon forest, a clown, chocolate cupcakes with pink frosting (gluten-free and vegan, and absolutely delicious, natch), dancing, giggling, and balloon sword fights.

There are days when the girls are at each others’ throats all day long.  And there are days where they are inseparable best of friends.  Here’s what they were doing today while waiting for the first party guests to arrive.  It might be a bit long for those of us used to 30-second clips, but the whole thing makes me smile.

I didn’t know Michael was filming, or I’d have stopped putting dishes away.  No, I wouldn’t, but I’d have been quieter about it.  Oh, and it was Jade who put The Four Seasons in the CD player, by the way.

Perspective

29 Jul

It has been a hectic week.  Four of the five suitcases from our trip are still sitting, unpacked, on the basement floor.  I’ve spent a total of about 16 hours in the recording studio, which has been thrilling and exhausting at the same time.  Jade has been attending music camp for three quarters of an hour every morning, the sessions being just short enough that it doesn’t make sense to try to run errands as they unfold.

A few days after we got back, Halia came down with a fever and some kind of stomach bug and I got to reacquaint myself with the art of catching vomit with whatever happens to be available.  On top of that, she is in the throes of exploring preschooler independence, which manifests itself in saying mean things to Jade (which makes Jade cry), selective listening, tantrums, and teenageresque expressiveness.

“Halia, get off my chair,” I might say.

“Okaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy,” she’ll drawl back, her voice implying the rolling eyes she has not yet learned to do.

She’s a challenge for sure, and she tests my patience daily.  Hourly.

This morning I was thinking back to what Jade was like at this same age.  That puts us back in September of 2008, a time I try not to think too much about.  That was a month before Jade started on the ketogenic diet, a time where her seizures were getting progressively worse, the last month we had her in daycare before her seizures became so severe it was no longer safe to send her there.

I remember hearing friends bemoaning their children’s behaviour, who were doing exactly the same kinds of things Halia is doing now.  I remember thinking, “I would take those challenges over what Jade is going through.  Any day.”  I remember wishing I could complain about the same mundane things.

And here I am.  It’s exhausting, yes, but oh my… Right at this moment, I feel so damn lucky.

Mom mornings

12 Jul

Jade is sleeping in the basement here at the cabin, so that she and Halia don’t disturb each other at bedtime, and because the basement is far cooler than the top bunk she was sleeping in upstairs.  Michael is sleeping with her down there, while I’m upstairs with Halia, with a fan pointed at my body to ward off the heat.

At 6:30 this morning, Jade climbed up the two flights of stairs and came into my room, weeping.

“I’m hungry!” she wailed.  This is my regular wake-up call most mornings.  But I shushed her groggily, not wanting Halia to be woken, not really wanting to wake up myself.

“Why didn’t you tell Papa you wanted breakfast?” I whispered to her.

“Because he’s still asleep,” she sobbed.

*sigh*

Shhh, pass it on!

17 May

Okay, I don’t want to be be too rambunctious about it, because we all know the universe is a tease.  But… (whispers) one year ago yesterday is the last time I marked down an observed seizure.

(Whispers even more quietly.)

That makes today Jade’s one-year anniversary of seizure-freedom.

I’m doing a very quiet happy dance. (But Michael isn’t!)

The universe is a tease

16 May

I got some sad news on Friday.  Yes, Friday.  The 13th.  I should have known it was coming.

Remember my beloved spoon spatulas?  The ones that work so perfectly for Jade, but which were discontinued?  The ones I found on an online store in Alberta?

You can see it coming can’t you?

Yes, the store realized, with my order, that those spatulas have been discontinued and that they can’t supply them.

Excuse me for a moment while I turn my head and sob just a little.  (Or perhaps I should press the back of my hand to my forehead.  That’s more dramatic, maybe?)

Earlier in the week, I got a surprise package in the mail, from a spatula fairly who turned out to be my dad.  It’s the new style of Danesco spoon spatula.  And while it is certainly a very superior spatula, it won’t work well for Jade because the leading edge is far too wide to fit into her mouth.

Of the treasure trove my mother-in-law sent, my runner-up favourite is the blue one from Home Sense.  Its only drawback is that it’s not as deeply scooped, so some things (like Jade’s Almond Breeze drink) tend to run off.  The black Lee Valley ones have wonderfully thin edges, but aren’t scooped at all.

My next desperate plan might be to buy food-grade silicone and a belly casting kit and attempt to recreate the Danesco ones, myself.  (Just imagine how much trial and error that would entail.)

So, bloggy peeps, do me a favour, please?  On your travels through stores that sell kitchen paraphernalia, be on the lookout for a spatula with the following properties:

  1. Softish head material, like silicone or rubber (though the handle can be made of any material)
  2. Very fine edges
  3. Scooped shape for retaining ingredients without dribbling off the opposite side
  4. Narrow scraping end to fit into Jade’s little 5-year-old mouth.  Jade’s Danesco spatulas are 1 inch wide at the bottom and widen to 1-3/4″ in the middle.
You wouldn’t think that would be such a tall order would you?
But anyway, if you can’t locate my favourite spatulas, would you please help me in sending the universe a message that it shouldn’t be such a tease?

I love my keto kid: post-Easter edition

28 Apr

The kids got to have two Easter egg hunts this year.  There was the Easter bunny visit to our house, of course, and Jade was so excited that he hid the plastic treasure-filled eggs in the living room and the kitchen this year.

Then we went out to our friends’ cabin at Lake Laberge and coloured eggs and then had an outdoor hunt.  Jade and Halia collected over 30 caramel-filled chocolate eggs between the two of them.  I let Halia eat five (actually, I said she could have three, but she managed to con her way into two more).  Jade wanted to keep a few, and I let her, even though she couldn’t eat them, of course.  I encouraged her to give them away to people, and she did that charmingly.

Today I found the last one, all deformed from having melted, then cooled, in the pocket of the dress she wore that night.

The wrapping was intact.  She hadn’t tried to open it at all.

I marvelled tonight that she is so trustworthy and so disciplined, that when she slipped it into her pocket on Sunday night, it never even occurred to me  to worry about it.

I shouldn’t take that for granted.  She is one awesome little girl.

I love my keto kid.

Everything’s louder now

16 Mar

Thursday morning I woke Jade up at 6:30, got her dressed in some warm sweaters, hat, mitts, and we drove to the hospital.  I had the flu and really shouldn’t have been at the hospital, but Michael absolutely had to work that day and I couldn’t really send Sonja to the hospital with my soon-to-be-anesthetized keto kid.

The surgery went smoothly, as expected, and although the Medazolam withdrawal was awful (crying, incoherent demands, shrieking, and general freaking out) Jade came through with flying colours, with two tubes perforating her eardrums.

The next day I was in bed, but I overheard Jade saying to Sonja, “Everything is louder now.”

Today we went to see Jade’s audiologist.  Lalia peeked into Jade’s ears and told her that her tubes were bright green.  She tested the eardrum for pressure, and for the first time since November, the eardrums didn’t push back.  Next she ran a test that measured the nerve response in Jade’s ears.  This is a test that Jade had never had before because it can’t be done when there is fluid in the middle ear.  Jade’s ears were perfect.

We’ll go back to see Lalia in 6 months.  ”It’s so good to finally see your ears up and running!” she said to Jade.

I can’t believe this fight is over and suddenly we have exactly what we wanted: clear ears that hear the way they’re supposed to.  Just like that.

Ear and schedule congestion

7 Mar

Timeline 1

9:15 a.m Get the kids into the van to take Jade to her audiologist appointment, the one that was originally booked for Wednesday, but got switched to Monday so that it could happen before Jade’s otolaryngologist appointment in the afternoon.

9:19 a.m. Realize the van won’t start, even with a booster pack hooked to the battery.

9:21 a.m. Swear a whole lot (mostly inaudibly) while wrestling carseats out of the van and into the Volvo. (Thank GOD Norris came home with it yesterday.)

9:50 a.m. Arrive for 9:30 audiologist appointment.

9:51 a.m. Sigh a gigantic sigh of relief that Jade can still keep the appointment.

The audiologist confirmed that Jade’s ears were even more congested than before, but at least they weren’t red, as they were on Friday, when the young lady awoke with a fever of 38 °C (100.4 °F). (Jade was put on antibiotics for the first time since she started keto.  Finding low-carb antibiotics was fun.)

Timeline 2

2:35 p.m. Arrive at Deb’s house to drop off Halia.  Thank heavens Deb said she could babysit for a couple of hours so that I don’t have to have two kids at the Ear, Nose, and Throat appointment.  Kill time by singing songs because I promised I’d drop Halia off around 2:45 and I don’t want to be so early as to be rude.

2:41 p.m. Let Halia out of the car and greet the person coming out of Deb’s house, only to realize my car is blocking hers and I have to back up a few feet.  Get the stranger to hold Halia’s hand so I can back up the car.  Realize this was a bad idea when Halia crumbles into a puddle of despair.

2:45 p.m. Leave a somewhat calmish Halia in Deb’s very capable hands and proceed on schedule to pick up Jade from school.

2:55 p.m. Just before the last turn to Jade’s school, realize that although I grabbed Halia’s snack bag and diaper bag, plus my notebooks of information and my purse, Jade’s snack and afternoon dose of antibiotic are still sitting on the counter at home.

3:20 p.m. Arrive at the school, in possession of snack and antibiotic.  Thank my lucky stars I went back for it instead of deciding to skip snack, because Jade really wanted it.

3:32 p.m. Admitted to see Dr. Cleland, Otolaryngologist.

I’ve been anxious to get Jade to see an Ear, Nose, and Throat specialist since early December.  The pediatricians from BC Children’s Hospital who saw Jade last month agreed with me that she should be seen ASAP.  Unfortunately, it can take several months to get an appointment with the visiting specialist.  I think the pediatricians’ advocacy, added to our neurologist’s (who had already put Jade on the radar of the pediatric ENT down at BC Children’s Hospital, who then added his opinion that Jade should be seen ASAP) was the reason Jade was able to get an appointment this month.

Not only that, but Dr. Cleland agreed something should be done about Jade’s ears.  And since there have been a couple of cancellations in his schedule (who cancels their appointment after waiting three months for one?!) Jade will be able to have the tympanostomy surgery on Thursday morning.

Now, who can I get to babysit Halia while Jade and I see the anesthetist on Wednesday morning, and attend the pre-operative clinic on Wednesday afternoon?!

Also: happy dance!

I thought I’d have to wait a few more years to hear this

6 Mar

Jade patted me on the arm as she was finishing supper tonight and said, “You’re a good Mama.”

That must be one of the most beautiful surprises I’ve ever had.  I thanked her and asked her why she had said that.

“You always take such good care of us,” she said, nodding her head and patting my arm again.

I think I may have swooned.

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