Never Smile at a Crocodile

15 Apr
For any of the new dads out there, here’s a handy anecdote to remember something you should never do.

Without mentioning names…

A baby started crying first thing in the morning, and the father turned
to his wife in bed and asked, "You want me to get her and change her
diaper?" The tired mother said with delight, "Yes, and it’s time
for her to get up now." Whereupon dad said, "Oh, okay, then I’ll
just let you get her, then," and rolled over for more sleep.

This will definitely not win you any points.

At the very least, if you do commit such a blunder, you should be
penitent enough to get up and cook a good breakfast for your wife while
she’s getting hungrier and hungrier feeding your offspring.

Unless, because of a massive snowfall that could get your family stuck
inside the house until Victoria Day, you have to get up to shovel the
driveway, as Michael eventually did do.

Oops, ha ha! I forgot I wasn’t mentioning any names.


6 Responses to “Never Smile at a Crocodile”

  1. Meandering April 15, 2006 at 11:39 pm #

    It\’s usually good to hear both sides of a situation, and this would be one of those times.  The conversation went more like this:
    Baby:  Wah!  Wah!Me:  Do you want me to go get her?Fawn:  She\’ll need her diaper changed.  I have to feed her.Me (thinking that Fawn was telling me not to bother since she was getting up to feed Jade anyways):  Ok, so you\’re just going to get her then?
    Apparently I forgot the first law of marriage:  If the wife has to suffer, then the husband also has to suffer.  If the husband has to suffer, he suffers alone. :p

  2. Fawn April 16, 2006 at 3:12 pm #

    How easily he forgets that I always let him sleep when Jade wakes up in
    the middle of the night; here\’s the first time he\’s being asked to get
    up (and after all, it\’s already 7:30). 

    And your exact words were definitely, "I\’ll just let you get her then,"
    which doesn\’t have the same feel at all; you weren\’t asking me, you
    were telling.  You even agreed with me earlier yesterday that
    those were the words you used, so don\’t you go changing the story

    Anyway, your crime isn\’t that you let me get up, it\’s that you made an
    offer and then rescinded your offer after I had accepted it.  Hey,
    I could sue you for breach of contract!

  3. Meandering April 17, 2006 at 12:29 am #

    A contract would require some sort of amount to be paid – known in
    legal circles as "consideration".  In this case, there was no
    consideration whatsoever.

  4. Fawn April 18, 2006 at 12:15 pm #

    Actually, consideration does not have to be monetary.  One 1875 English case, Currie v. Misa, offered a definition of "consideration" which is still used:
    ".. some right, interest, profit or benefit accruing to the one party or some forbearance, detriment, loss or responsibility given, suffered or undertaken by the other."
    I was emotionally invested into the idea of 5 more minutes of sleep (or really, more like 10, since you always play with Jade for a while during diaper changes) and so therefore, when you inappropriately rescinded your offer, I suffered a loss.

  5. Meandering April 22, 2006 at 12:30 pm #

    Very interesting.  Not the type of consideration I had in mind, but…

  6. Fawn April 25, 2006 at 2:14 pm #

    Haha! Oh, you\’re right – there was absolutely no consideration!

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