25 not-so-random things

19 Feb
  1. I have been tagged for the “25 Random Things” meme on Facebook 7 times.
  2. The biggest reason I haven’t written on the blog in so long is because I haven’t felt like blogging.  Sorry, it’s true.  The strain of watching Jade’s cold cause seizure upon seizure, her lack of appetite, plus Halia having a wee cold and trouble breathing was all just adding up to become insurmountable.  I couldn’t find the motivation to sit down at the computer when I losing my mind.  Seriously.
  3. There’s a squirrel sitting on the back fence outside my window.  (Okay, that was random.)
  4. By Sunday last week, I was so finished with everything, I was swearing (almost under my breath) as I was forcing Jade to finish yet another meal she didn’t want to eat and I had a strong urge to fling dishes around in the kitchen.  It wasn’t pretty, people.
  5. On Monday, Michael and Jade left for Vancouver.
  6. I felt like I was on vacation.
  7. I spent all morning running errands, blissfully taking my time at the shops.  All Halia needs is a few fresh diapers and my boobs… no rush to be anywhere!
  8. I spend the afternoon baking a birthday cake pie tart thing for a friend.  It was clear that I am out of practice, as the process ended up taking far longer than it should have.
  9. Did you know that if there’s a crack in your pastry shell, any uncooked custard you might pour in will leak out around your tart?  (It will.)
  10. Did you know springform pans aren’t leakproof?  (They’re not.  At least, mine isn’t.)
  11. Did you know that custard won’t set if you fail to turn the oven back on after cleaning up leaked custard?
  12. Thank goodness the element the springform pan was sitting on was just small enough that the custard leaked all around it, not into it.  That would have been a bitch to clean up.
  13. Jade recovered from her cold sufficiently that she did great, seizure-wise, while she was  in Vancouver.
  14. Her EEG on Tuesday afternoon showed that although we’re seeing fewer seizures, she’s having more sub-clinical seizures than before.  (Sub-clinical seizures are seizure activity that are not outwardly apparent, but can be seen in the electrical activity of the brain.  They can impact Jade’s learning and behaviour.)
  15. Jade’s epileptologist was pleased to see Jade so much brighter than at the start of the diet.  In order to see if we can get a handle on the sub-clinical seizures, she recommended increasing the ratio of Jade’s diet from 4:1 to 4.5:1.
  16. This means Jade will be eating even more fat than before.  I haven’t worked on the recipes yet to see how they will be impacted, but I am not excited about this.
  17. We have also dropped the final amount of Keppra, so Jade is now down to two medications.  Yes!
  18. I had no Internet access while Michael and Jade were away because Michael took the modem with him so that he could work.
  19. I had such a long list of things I wanted to do while Michael and Jade were away.  I knew I couldn’t possibly do them all, but I made a pretty good dent. I painted a quote on Halia’s wall, hung some shadow boxes, and made a mobile out of some little stuffed teddy bears my Oma sent to her for Christmas.
  20. I would have been happy for Michael and Jade to stay in Vancouver for one more day (although this would have added to the six solid hours of cooking I did on Sunday to get them ready for the trip).  However, I felt quite refreshed by the end of Tuesday night, and almost ready to take on two kids again.
  21. I was planning a joyous blog post for today since I got a chance to recharge my batteries and feel more or less sane again.
  22. Sadly, Michael’s mom phoned this morning and told us that his Pop (her dad) died last night.
  23. Pop deserves so much more of a post than a mention in this list, but I’m not sure I can rise to the occasion.  In a nutshell, I think he was the ideal people think of when they talk about “a good man”.  Stoic, chivalrous, witty, and loving, I feel privileged to have known him.
  24. Even though we had legitimate reasons, I feel guilty about cancelling our trip to Toronto / Ottawa at Christmas.  We haven’t seen Granny and Pop in person since Jade was 10 months old.  I hope he knows how much I love him.
  25. There’s no good way to end this post, but it’s 3 o’clock and time to give Jade her afternoon snack.  (I love you, Pop.)

12 Responses to “25 not-so-random things”

  1. Marian February 19, 2009 at 3:25 pm #

    Fawn, Pop would have been upset if you’d come at Christmas when you were having such a difficult time adjusting to Jade’s diet and a new baby….as would I. It would have been far too stressful.

    Pop knew you loved him….and he loved you too. We’ll all miss him terribly.

    Lots of love and hugs

  2. Captain Momma February 19, 2009 at 4:10 pm #

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss and I am sorry that Jade’s sub-seizures are up meaning you have to add more fat to the diet when it’s already very hard to get her to eat it all.

    I am glad to hear you got a break from two kids, breaks are important.

    Will be praying for you 🙂


  3. Kara February 19, 2009 at 4:19 pm #

    I love your honesty Fawn. I bet I would have broken every dish in my house with that kind of stress. You are an amazing woman!

  4. MommyTime February 19, 2009 at 5:44 pm #

    I am so sorry for your loss. I hope that your life can begin to feel somewhat less stressful soon. Sending my love.

  5. Nemmy February 19, 2009 at 5:46 pm #

    Erm… If I can ever do any cooking down here to help out on the diet front, just let me know eh? I’ll even buy a scale! 🙂

  6. Jenny February 20, 2009 at 9:09 am #

    I can not even imagine 4.5:1! Good luck with that! I was going to email you but I’ll put this info in this post. Naomi’s PT said to encourage her to crawl more. The crawling and the reciprocal motion of hands and legs keeps the neuro pathways open. So if the seizures cause any damage that will helpl keep those pathways firing.
    We’re fighting colds too. She was well 3 blessed days then came back, her nose looks like a water faucet! I’ve got a sore throat, hope she doesn’t have the same. Lots of sleepless nights! Up from 12:30 TO 4 AM last night and I’m sure to be a complete bitch by 4 p.m. tonight! 🙂

  7. Bubblybunny February 20, 2009 at 9:21 am #

    Sorry to hear you’ve been having such a bad time. Deepest sympathies to your husband and your family. I hope things will start looking up again real soon!!

  8. Michelle Mitchell February 20, 2009 at 10:37 am #

    Have you seen the version of the meme that’s written by Shakespeare? It’s a hoot!

  9. Asheya February 20, 2009 at 10:42 am #

    Glad to hear you got a bit of a break. We had colds last week too, and I have been feeling worn out, even without all the extra stress that you have of Jade’s diet and her seizures.

    So sorry to hear about Pop’s death. Try not to be too hard on yourself for not visiting at Christmas.

  10. Barbara February 20, 2009 at 12:08 pm #

    Sincere sympathy for your loss.

    ditto Asheya’s message.

  11. Opa February 20, 2009 at 12:23 pm #

    So sorry to hear about Pop – I only met him twice, I think, but he was a great guy with a super sense of humour.

    As to the “not to do list”, when in Fawn’s kitchen, don’t toast a hand-cut bread slice in the toaster oven unless the fire truck happens to be parked outside.

    Keep fighting, Jade. Love you lots. You, too, Halia.

  12. Tammy February 21, 2009 at 9:28 pm #

    Hi Fawn,
    Of course you’re on the list!

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