Following my star

16 Apr

I have news.

After weeks of stewing and chewing, mulling and waffling, I went to my boss on Friday and told him that I plan to leave my job this summer.

{Pause for thunderous applause}

Thank goodness, my boss is a real prince and managed to be both disappointed and warmly supportive at the same time.

I’ve talked here before about how thin I’ve been spreading myself.  How impossible it has been to balance parenting and work and still make time for my music.  I was so burnt out by the end of February, I had to use vacation days to reduce my work week just to make it manageable.  Something had to be removed from the equation.  (And parenting certainly isn’t an option!)

Over the past few years, I’ve gradually become more and more serious about developing myself as a musician, until suddenly I find myself straddling my old career path and a new one.  Singing has become such a huge part of my life that it isn’t optional if I don’t want lose an important piece of myself.

While I’ve struggled with the decision of whether to quit my nice secure government job, Michael has not.  He’s been staunchly supportive of the idea of ending my government employment and spending more time with the girls and on my music.  (Yes, I consider myself quite clever for marrying my #1 fan.)

Since I’ve talked to my boss about it, it’s suddenly become scarily real.  (Aaaaaaghhhhh!!!!)  But at the same time, I feel I’m doing the right thing.   And I know that I am tremendously lucky to be able to do that: to have my husband’s support, and also to feel that we’ll be able to handle it financially.

I remember my dad asking me, when I was finishing high school and trying to decide what to study, what my passion was.  For years I’ve been distressed that I couldn’t answer that question.  Now I can.

Photo by Christian Kuntz (www.christiansphotography.com)

For the first time in my life, I am choosing to follow a dream, and not just what’s practical.  For the first time in my life, I am looking ahead at my career and feeling deliciously excited about the possibilities.  I’m not expecting fame and fortune; but to feel the rush and excitement and to follow my heart… that’s priceless.

21 Responses to “Following my star”

  1. kara April 16, 2011 at 11:17 pm #

    *THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE*

    That is so fantastic, Fawn!
    🙂

  2. Tine April 17, 2011 at 12:56 am #

    That’s awesome news🙂 !! (I’ve always been SO impressed with your singing, so I’m glad to hear you keep going🙂 – awesome pic, by the way !!)

    Hope once you’ve stopped working, you won’t have to tear yourself to pieces anymore to get everything done …

    Good luck, Süße !!

    ♥ ♥ ♥

    • Opa April 17, 2011 at 2:03 am #

      Christine, how come your English is so damn good? Most non-native speakers need a long time to get a good grasp of idiomatic phrases…..

  3. Opa April 17, 2011 at 2:04 am #

    Climb every mountain, search high and low
    Follow every byway, every path you know
    Climb every mountain, ford every stream
    Follow every rainbow, till you find your dream

    A dream that will need
    All the love you can give
    Every day of your life
    For as long as you live

    Climb every mountain, ford every stream
    Follow every rainbow, till you find your dream

    • Marianne Fritzen April 18, 2011 at 8:14 am #

      Hi, Fawny, warum schreibe ich Dir heute eine lange mail? Hätte ich doch vorher in Deinen blog geschaut. Du hast Dich also entschieden! Der Flügel steht noch da !!! und wartet auf Deine songs. Wo hat Dein dad bloß wieder dieses wunderbare Gedicht gefunden? Climb every Mountain —- “Sound of music”? Soll er mir mal verraten!
      Tendresses à vous tous

      Omi

  4. Genevieve April 17, 2011 at 5:37 am #

    You’re listening to the whisper! Hooray! Preparation is meeting opportunit(ies), you are on the right path: YOUR path. Enjoy yourself Fawn and all that you’ll accomplish. xox

  5. Marian April 17, 2011 at 6:16 am #

    So happy for you. Looking forward to our next visit to Whitehorse (whenever that might be) so we can see our star in action!
    The girls will be happy to have you home. I already “feel” that some of the stress has been lifted from your shoulders. There’s a lightness in your voice that’s been missing for a while.
    Hugs.

  6. Idania April 17, 2011 at 6:45 am #

    Hooray! Have you ever noticed the things that you most regret in life are the things you did *not* go for? 🙂

    I am so excited that you are following your dream! I’m excited to see what the rest of the year will bring to you!

  7. Murray April 17, 2011 at 7:02 am #

    Congratulations, Fawn. When you talk to older people and listen to what has made them happy or unhappy, very, very few of the unhappy ones have followed their dreams. It’s so easy to do what people expect “responsible” people to do – and then live with the “what-if” regrets forever. It takes courage to do what you’re doing, but having heard you sing, I’m very pleased to hear that you’re taking the next step.

  8. Scientific Chick April 17, 2011 at 9:48 am #

    That is very exciting news! Congratulations on making this big step and following your dreams. I love how you say you can’t give up singing without “losing an important piece of yourself”. Good for you for realizing this and doing something about it! Good luck in this new career… I can’t wait to read (and hear!) all about it!

  9. susan hamilton April 17, 2011 at 1:46 pm #

    How brave, follow your heart Fawn. You have the talent,
    just go for it.
    Hopefully you will be singing somewhere in Whitehorse in
    June. I would love to hear you in person.

    Wishing you all the best

  10. Megan April 17, 2011 at 5:14 pm #

    Good for you!

  11. Cristina (Bertrand's Mom) April 17, 2011 at 5:25 pm #

    YAY!!! What exciting news! I look forward to following your star as it rises form afar! Love & hugs! C 🙂

  12. taibhsearachd April 17, 2011 at 7:10 pm #

    Yeah Fawn!!! This is great news all around…not just for you and your family, but for all the rest of us who will benefit from having more opportunities to enjoy that amazing voice of yours.

  13. Clare April 18, 2011 at 6:27 am #

    I imagine that it feels exhilarating, much like standing at the edge of a precipice. Following your dreams can be daunting, but I have a feeling that you’ll weather the challenges of leaving security just fine. And the musical world will be all the richer for it.

  14. canadianfoodiegirl April 18, 2011 at 12:37 pm #

    So exciting! Good for you!

    Here’s an anecdote for you:
    In 2008, one of my government contract jobs came about because an employee who was also a folk musician was taking the summer off to tour across Canada with her group.

    Like you, she’d been holding down a day job and performing in the evenings (and her government job started at 6am). A few months after the end of the tour & coming back to her job she quit to pursue music full time. They performed and recorded.

    Her group has since won a Juno Award. I like to think that I deserve a small bit of credit for that.🙂

  15. Nita April 18, 2011 at 2:05 pm #

    I am so proud of you! We have similar struggles – we need to share a cup of tea & talk about it.

  16. Barbara April 18, 2011 at 6:59 pm #

    Thunderous applause!!!

  17. Laural Out Loud April 18, 2011 at 9:40 pm #

    How wonderfully exciting! I hope you’re singing career explodes!

  18. Captain Momma April 19, 2011 at 3:44 pm #

    YAY! I was hoping you’d choose the music! I think you are wonderfully talented and I am completely jealous that you get to wear beautiful dresses to go to work!! LOL! (I am a closet evening gown enthusiast!!)

    Booting the ol’ gov’t job goodbye has some great perks! You won’t look back and I am so glad to hear that Michael is still your #1 fan!!

    Blessings, can’t wait to hear more!

    Kelli

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. That year-in-review thing « Fawnahareo’s Place - December 31, 2011

    […] April: I have news. […]

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