It’s after midnight

15 May

…that makes it May 16th.

Three years ago today, I recorded 2 tonic seizures in Jade’s logbook. Those were the last seizures we ever observed. Somehow, maybe because the diet was and remains so consuming and rigorous, I can’t fully comprehend that span of time.
But I know, academically at least, that 3 years is a big milestone.
And I realized earlier today that even though there are a number of Jade’s medical issues that continue to make me anxious, it’s been a long time since I fell asleep straining to hear a gasp in the night, counting another seizure. It’s been a long time since I watched her and ached over her constant fatigue from fighting seizures, and over her sedation from fighting her drugs. It’s been a long time since I’ve had to hover by her side, waiting to catch her in case a drop seizure snuck up on her to violently throw her to the ground.
Today she is going to audition for the school talent show. She’s planning to dance. She’s never taken dance, but that doesn’t matter. She believes she is wonderful. She believes she is special. She believes she is smart.
She knows herself. And she doesn’t remember having seizures.
I do. But, after three years, some of it is starting to fade, just a little. And all I can say is… thank God.

11 Responses to “It’s after midnight”

  1. Opa May 16, 2013 at 3:35 am #


  2. Megan May 16, 2013 at 4:39 am #


  3. brekkenc May 16, 2013 at 9:18 am #

    Congratulations to all of you. An amazing milestone for an amazing family and little girl. May these milestones keep marking your path and we will keep cheering you on the journey!

  4. jen May 16, 2013 at 10:21 am #

    Great, happy, inspirational news to hear today. Sometimes I wonder if things can really work out in this seemingly gloomy world, and I’m so happy that they do, with stories like these!

  5. MommyTime May 16, 2013 at 1:17 pm #

    I am so very thankful on your behalf. The most incredible moment after my son’s accident last year was when we got to its anniversary, and the date meant nothing to him (even though for months, he would reiterate the date the accident had happened) — so I know how incredibly liberating it feels to know that your child is healing past even the memory. I also know how hard it is to have that memory yourself. All I can say is that it will continue to fade, and you will continue to breathe, and you will gradually come to believe it more and more.

    Hugs to you, my dear!! What a wonderful milestone.

  6. Nemmy May 16, 2013 at 1:32 pm #

    She is all those things and more. Love that kid. xox

  7. Nita May 16, 2013 at 2:46 pm #

    Thank you, Fawn. We all love her so much. On another note, I would love to spend some time with Jade teaching her some dancing with a veil…

  8. mfamama May 16, 2013 at 7:20 pm #

    SO amazing!

  9. Cristina (Bertrand's Mom) May 16, 2013 at 8:21 pm #

    WOW! What a wonderful anniversary! So happy for you all! Cheering for Jade down here in SLC! XOXO

  10. Barbara TherExtras May 31, 2013 at 11:17 am #

    Happy dance!

  11. shannon July 8, 2013 at 2:10 pm #

    tears of joy 🙂

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